Following Directions

Ian had an assignment today to write directions that are easy to follow. We went through an exercise making a Peanut Butter & Jelly sandwich with him giving the instructions and me following them in a literal way. Then he decided to write directions on how to brush your teeth. 5 minutes later he came in giggling and said he was done. This is what he turned in:

1. Get out your tooth brush and toothpaste.
2. Set the toothbrush down and squeeze the toothpaste until it blows up.
3. Make sure the toothpaste is spread all over the room and then bring in a battery.
4. Drop it in the toothpaste room and the toothpaste will come alive.
5. Drop anything you don't want (except laundry softener) into the tooth paste room so that the monster will eat it (It loves junk).

After a good laugh, I handed him another piece of paper and told him to try again. After what seemed like pulling teeth, this is what he turned in next.

Note for Moms: Things in ( ): IGNORE
1. Take out your toothbrush and toothpaste (explosive flavor.)
2. Take off the (explosive) toothpaste cap and squeeze the (explosive) toothpaste onto your toothbrush.
3. Stick the toothbrush in your mouth and brush your teeth. (If it isn't explosive flavor your head won't blow up)
4. If you don't know how to brush, Just LOOK IT UP IN A DICTIONARY!

*Teacher's note: Ian, the purpose of this assignment is to teach people to brush their teeth. All you've done is teach people to put toothpaste on their toothbrush. What if you were from Mars and didn't know what brushing your teeth is? Please add a few more steps.

4. Move your toothbrush in circular motions to brush all 3 sides of your teeth. (If you're a martian and don't have teeth, then you should know that you'd been reading this for no reason.)
5. After you have brushed every side of every tooth, rinse your mouth out and rinse your toothbrush in the sink
6. Put it away. When you put the paste away, don't forget to put the cap on!

This is a perfect example of why I am homeschooling this child. Assignment #1 would have been turned in as the finished product completely disregarding whole objective of the assignment to write descriptively. Although his creative writing is very entertaining at times, it is also important to take assignments seriously enough to learn the concept that was meant to be taught.